Sunday, May 31, 2009

He's Gone

Today I sent my 10 year old son across the country. I'm so scared and sad. Actually I'm terrified. Last Fall his teacher mentioned that she would like to take a group of students back east to tour the Eastern Seaboard. I was really excited to send Braxton since I used to nanny there back in the day, so, I signed him up. That is so typical of me. I get so excited and gung ho about something and commit to it, then later I really think of the ramifications and what it all means. So this Spring, I started feeling really stressed about all this and today he left.

It really is going to be such a wonderful experience for him. He'll learn a ton, and I'm sure his teacher will take better care of him than I would have. She is amazing.

Braxton was so scared to go, but he really wanted to go. He was scared the plane would crash into a building like 9-11 and scared the big buildings in NY would fall while he was in them. Of course, I helped him see that the chances of all that happening were slim to none.

All day today he has been singing and really excited about his trip. He could hardly believe it was here. And as I hugged him goodbye, irrational fear gripped me...maybe his plane WOULD crash into a building like 9-11, maybe the big buildings in NY WOULD fall while he was in them, maybe he would get abducted, maybe he would get lost, maybe someone would be mean to him, or maybe he would just feel homesick and need me to tell him everything would be alright. I can't believe I just sent my 10 year old across the country.

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